The XO Interview: Andie J. Christopher

On kissing books, heroes who do therapy, inspiration from TikTok and Unrealistic Expectations

Andie J. Christopher is the author of “kissing books with ‘unlikeable heroines’” (which I love, and which I ask her about) and, in my opinion, she is also the author of contemporary romances that feel truly contemporary. Her latest novel, Unrealistic Expectations, features a hero who is suffering the fall out from dating an online influencer, an “older” heroine who was inspired by TikTok videos, and lots of therapy.  We chatted about all that, books with kissing “before the last page” and what the HEA means for us “elder millennials.” 

How did you first discover the romance genre? Which book was The One for you?

I discovered romance in the same way a lot of people did—I found a grocery bag full of Harlequin category romances in my grandma’s closet. There were lots of the kind with taciturn heroes who gave no indication that they didn’t think the heroines were “little fools” until after the heroines got fed up with them and quit being their secretary or nanny, and then they kissed on the last page. But I used to hunt out the ones where the heroine had a professional job that put her at odds with the hero. Those ones had witty banter and a kissing before the last page.

Eventually, I graduated to my mom’s mass market paperbacks. There were lots of Johanna Lindsey, Connie Mason, and Jackie Collins. I think Savage Thunder by Johanna Lindsey had the first sex scene that I remember really blowing my socks off. (They were on a horse. The entire premise of the book is problematic, but that scene is truly iconic.)

Your new book Unrealistic Expectations features Jessica Gallagher, a relationship therapist who gets dumped just before her dating book is released. The solution is obvious: fake dating with her old crush, Galvin Baker who has his own reasons for agreeing. I am on record as stating that the fake relationship is the best trope. What was particularly fun about writing it with these two characters?

I find myself returning to the fake dating trope relatively often in books—Not the Girl You Marry, Not That Kind of Guy, and now Unrealistic Expectations all have variations on that theme. And the characters’ reasons for fake dating are all different. With Jessica and Galvin, I think that their reasons for wanting to be in a public relationship were unique. Jessica needs to be in a relationship in order to establish her credibility in advising people about relationships, and Galvin needs to prove that he’s not the fuckboy his public image has made him out to be.

I think that fake dating resonates more now because there are fewer concrete reasons to do than there were in the past. Even though being single is more acceptable than it used to be, I think a lot of people still assume there’s something wrong with long-term single folks. I think a lot of fake dating in books is sympathetic because it fulfills the needs of the people around the characters—it’s an emotionally generous act to fake a whole relationship just to reassure other people that you’re okay. And then the relationships turns along the way to being something that fulfills the main characters’ needs. That’s the delicious part of reading and writing the fake dating trope for me.

I think Jessica’s reason for fake dating—that she wants people to trust her enough to help them—are more altruistic than Galvin wanting to clean up his image. However, the fake dating trope has this interesting arc of going from something that’s for other people to an ultimately fulfilling the characters’ internal needs.

One cool thing about Galvin—who has many fine heroic qualities—is that he has done therapy. Independently of the heroine. For himself. In other words, he’s done a lot of the work “off stage” and it’s clear in the way he shows up for the heroine. Was it different writing a hero who has done therapy?

A lot of readers have told me that my characters read like they’ve been in therapy, and I really wanted to lean into that with Galvin. However, a lot of cishet men in my own life have been to therapy, but sometimes they use the tools they learn in therapy to manipulate other people (see e.g., Jonah Hill’s texts to his ex). But I wanted Galvin to have actually done work on himself. I think, at center, he’s a really lonely guy. And he turned to some maladaptive coping mechanisms, like serial monogamy, to be less lonely. He wants to be less lonely, but he also wants to be better for the other people in his life. I think having him be so self-aware made him easier to write as a hero, even where it made amping up conflict a little challenging.

We can add this book to the older heroines reading list—Jessica is 37. Gasp! She’s very settled in her career and her relationship (perhaps too settled). She’s a relationship therapist who has to confront her own relationship issues. Can you tell us a little about her journey to HEA?

Around the time I was starting to write the book, I was spending a lot of time of TikTok and running across a lot of “dating coaches” and relationship therapists. And the most common piece of advice they gave was not to rely on a “spark” or “chemistry” when deciding whether or not to pursue a relationship with someone.

And I just think this is terrible advice.

So, I decided to explore how that might play out with someone who intellectually understands so much about romantic relationships and who would *never* allow herself to be swept away by chemistry. What happens when you spend over a decade with someone who seems like a smart choice, and it ends? What happens when you’re wrong about what the rest of your life is going to look like? What it could look like? What happens when you make the “bad” decisions you’ve been trying to avoid in your late thirties instead of your early twenties?

I think Jessica’s journey to an HEA is really about her learning to trust herself, and I think that happens for a lot of people in their late thirties. It just felt right for her to be that age.

In your Insta bio, you describe your work as “kissing books with ‘unlikeable’ heroines” (love!). What do you think makes for an “unlikeable heroine” and why are they actually awesome?

I just think a romance is more satisfying when the main characters both go down fighting, and I think female main characters who flat-out don’t believe in love tend to strike romance readers—who tend to believe in love—as overly strident and cynical. But that’s what makes them believable to me. All of the female main characters I’m drawn to in pop culture are deeply flawed—and not in a cutesy, manic-pixie-dream-girl sort of way. And we don’t often get to see women of color in pop culture being flawed and still being loved. That’s what I want to do with my books.

How do romance novels give you joy?

This is probably not an original answer, but the comfort of knowing that everything’s going to be fine in the end is unmatched. As an elder millennial, my adult life has never held a whole lot of certainty. To know that hope and joy win in the end of a romance novel—no matter what happens up until 95%--is incredibly precious to me.